In continuation to my earlier blog Marriages are made in heaven… yet… I’d like you to be introduced to mode 2 of marriage experiences that I like. It’s the marriages of cousins/relatives.
In my family almost 90% of my cousins are girls. The rest 10% of my counterparts either married off very early (early as in, in my childhood days) or are yet to marry. Thus my experience is more or less limited to attending marriages of my so called ‘lady’ cousins. Those with whom I had grown up with, whom I care for, and with whom I have had friendly-fights for one reason or other or even for no reason… Of all the cousins, I dedicate this blog to my soul-sister (though we fight the very moment we see each other and coz now I know that she reads my blogs)
Attending such a function with your relatives is of great fun. You needn’t be that social by means. You just form a part of it as the time comes. As I had mentioned in the 1st post, its more about keeping a smiling face,.. trying to recognize who’s who & what is where.. Its slightly complicated.
It’s like someone comes to you and ask “Remember Me?” and you are in a fix. Many of my cousins recognize people. They even know the family tree and family history of people’s forefathers too! Phew! It’s a long shot for me. 🙂 and I admit it again that I’m not good at it.
So back to the question, and the in-a-fix situation. One can never answer to that question as “yes, I do” coz the very next question is going to be “Tell me, Who am I?” What-the-heck!!… Even Lord Buddha didn’t have answer to that, how can I know the solution?
So my answer these days are “I’m sure I’ve seen you at so-n-so’s marriage/function last time, but then I can’t recollect your name. It’s been quite long” That’s the safest answer I have come up with. They just change topic to that function and agrees on the time we met (though we might have seen for some other marriage/function in the near past). 🙂 Lucky me.!!
I’m not that ‘Family Oriented Person’ but I value my family and relatives with great respect, everyone equally, unbiased. 🙂
Normally I arrive on the day before marriage or two days prior to marriage. This is also an evasion technique to avoid the questions. The questions are always about my job, my settling plans, about flat/apartment that I’d buy (but I’ve never thought of anything in that regard) and questions about ‘I’ve a neighbor so-n-so, who has a very good & beautiful girl so-n-so, so-n-so. Interested?’, ‘is there someone you’ve already found?’, ‘when is yours?’, ‘you are next! Or are you?’
Some questions can be dodged out while some just hit you hard. With a crowd consisting of all aunties, uncles and older generations avoiding them at times are the safest bet. 🙂
I try to keep myself engaged at helping, arranging the food (un-avoidable by all means), serving welcome drinks (of-course cold ones) and snacks to guests who arrive to wish the bride-to-be.
At times I get my chance to tease the bride and my other cousins join the party. Its real fun then. Though you have to run around helping and supporting uncle and auntie a nice family get-together is total fun.
On Marriage day, you’ll be given certain responsibilities. Checking on the decorations of the hall in advance, arranging the cars -calling up drivers, picking the bride/relatives from the ‘beauty parlour’ and what not. But its real fun helping and being supportive. At least I can do that part well enough!
When the groom ties the knot, that feeling within as to see someone you grew up with, stepping into the next stage of her life gives a certain kind of feeling. Can’t really explain the mood as to what it is. But one thing is sure, the feeling is more of joy and also kind of ‘fellow feeling’ for the “poor” groom marrying your cousin!
[to be continued…]
P.S.: I dedicate this blog to my Soul-Sister. I thoroughly enjoyed attending her marriage in January 2010.
P.P.S.:Thanks to Sruthy, my wife, I’d be able to attend marriages of my brother-in-laws and share my experience.
Expecting a comment from: Sruthy, Sreelekha and… of course Manu
Also tagging Leo who wanted me to share marriage experiences