Got this as a Forward ..
1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
1. Crying is blackmail .
1. Ask for what you want.
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do.
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is aProblem .
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing’s wrong.
1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, Expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.
1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as FOOTBALL, CRICKET, or TENNIS.
1. You have enough clothes.
1. You have too many shoes.
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
1. Thank you for reading this.